We try our best at The Nuclear Unit to keep pumping out the funny. Admittedly, we miss the mark sometimes. That’s where you come in! You and I both know you’re funnier than the bullshit on this site. You’re always making that coworker in your shared cubicle laugh. And not the kind of courtesy laugh where people hope you’ll just shut up and move on, either. It’s the sincere kind. That’s what we like around here!

Here’s what we’re looking for…

Family related satire. That’s it. It’s pretty broad.

If you wanna be considered as one of the few, the proud, join the Marines. If you wanna be a contributor to The Nuclear Unit, we’ll pay you a little bit if we choose any of your pitches. We need a total of 10 headline pitches in The Nuclear Unit tone. Don’t write out the article. We won’t read it.

Please include “CONTRIBUTOR SUBMISSION” and THE DATE in the subject line and send your ideas HERE. A mixture of news, opinion and blog-style, pitches are preferable.

Happy parenting.